Now, theres a lot written about this President and his
assassination, theres a popular film you can rent (Oliver Stones JFK),
theres a boatload of documentaries (our personal favorite being "The Men Who
Killed Kennedy," because the producers interview witnesses that the Warren Commission
wasnt very interested in), and tons of material on the internet. But there are just
a few things that we want to add, especially from the book written by comedian Richard
Belzer, UFOS, JFK, and Elvis: Conspiracies You Dont Have to Be Crazy to Believejust
because a couple of things surprised us and because Belzer manages to use a light touch in
dealing with a heavy topic.
First, for the things that surprised us. Well, not this first bitit didnt
surprise us; wed heard it before. That is, of the seven members of the Warren
Commission, one was ex-CIA director Allen Dulles, fired by Kennedy, so of course hed
be objective. And then Dulles fired assistant was the brother of the mayor of Dallas
in those days, but that has to be a coincidenceright? Another member was
Rockefeller-family confidant John McCloy, former U.S. high commissioner in occupied
Germany, where he helped to commute the sentences of many Nazi war criminals, and anyone
who can do that has to be clever, we figure.
But heres the surprise (at least, it was for usif all of you know this,
dont tell us): we didnt know that member Gerald Ford (really Chevy Chase in
disguise) was an FBI informant, who (illegally) leaked information about the Warren
Commission to J. Edgar Hoover or that Ford championed the "single-bullet theory"
in a book he wrote about Oswald. And that was the shock for ushe wrote a book?
Neither did we know that three members of the seven-member Warren Commission dissented.
Kentuckys Senator John Sherman Cooper and Georgias Senator Richard Russell
didnt buy the "single-bullet theory," and Senator Russell wanted a
footnote put in the 26-volume report to that effect. The footnote never appeared, of
course, because the Warren Commission had better things to do with its 26 volumes (check
out the last two paragraphs below) and because those dissenting senators are just too
annoying to be considered.
House majority leader T. Hale Boggs (journalist Cokie Roberts fatherdid you
know that? we didnt) went so far as to accuse the FBI of Gestapo-like tactics and
publicly expressed doubts about the Warren Commissions findings. He disappeared in a
plane flight over Alaskawhich is what he gets for expressing doubts about anything
done by a committee. And how about this for a weird detail: the person who drove Boggs to
the airport for that fatal flight was a young Bill Clinton (Belzer, pp. 31-32). What are
the odds of that?
Finally, this two-paragraph quote from Belzer summarizes his tone (p. 34):
"The Warren Commision took seven pages of testimony from Mrs. Viola Peterson, a
woman who lived near Lee Oswald and his mother Marguerite, when Lee was "a good
little child" two years of age. She had not seen or heard from the Oswalds in
twenty-three years. Seven pages of testimony?
"The Commission also brought in Professor Revilio Pendleton, a ballistics expert,
to discuss an article he had written called Marksmanship in Dallas. Together
the Commission and Dr. Pendleton generated thirty-five (35!) pages of testimony
provingand I am not making this upthat Pendleton had absolutely no information
to contribute to any aspect of the Commission investigation. And were all thankful
for that, arent we?"